It’s been over a year since Paula Deen’s career was ravaged by her use of the N-word but now, the former television host is back and ready for her comeback.
After being fired from pretty much every endorsement deal the 67-year-old had, Deen made an appearance on NBC’s Today to talk about her return and how she has changed since her time out of the spotlight. In fact, the former face of the Food Network couldn’t even stand to look back at the footage from last year’s fiasco.
“I looked at none of it, Matt, because I didn’t recognize that woman,” she told host Matt Lauer. “That was a woman in trauma, in, I would say shock, trying to understand what had happened. The cold, hard fact, Matt, is I probably should not have been here. I probably should have been at home, maybe even under the care of a doctor.”
During her chat with Lauer, Deen opened up about being dropped by business partners such as WalMart, QVC, Target and the Food Network. “I had a hard time understanding because it had been 30 years,” she explained. “I had to go home, sit on my sofa and get off the merry-go-round. I had to remove myself and sit quietly so I that I could think and see things from all angles.”
So what does Deen have planned for the near future? “I really feel like it’s going to require another book. We are working on a documentary because I feel like everybody needs to know the entire story,” she said. “We’re doing a documentary that will be on the Paula Deen Network. But, as I was saying, I learned so much when I sat quietly with my own thoughts. The most powerful thing—and I thought I knew it, because I’ve talked about it before—is the power of words. I don’t care how old they are. Words are so powerful. They can hurt. They can make people happy. Well, my words hurt people. They disappointed people. And frankly, I disappointed myself. And for that, I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry for the hurt that I’ve caused people. Because it went deep. It went deep. People lost their jobs. It went deep into corporate America. I’m here to make people happy, not to bring sadness.”
After a former employee filed a lawsuit against the Georgia Native over allegations of sexual harassment and racial discrimination, Deen admitted in a deposition that she has indeed used the N-word in the past.
Watch Paula Deen express her feelings about last year below:
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